Your inner critic; the jerk

I think that friendship is the most important thing in the world. A healthy friendship involves honesty, kindness, and compassion. It involves being fully invested in non-judgement, empathy, and a lack of criticism. 

MINDFULLY MENDING MARCH SUGGESTION: talk to yourself the way you would talk to your favourite friends. 

Everyone has an inner critic. A voice inside your head that tells you all the things that you have done or will do wrong. That voice that says negative things. 

That voice is a jerk. 

Before we start to question and challenge that voice, it is useful to understand where it came from. 

"We can start by understanding one major concept: we are, in many ways, ruled by our past. From the moment we’re born, we absorb the world around us. The early attitudes, beliefs and behaviors we were exposed to can become an inner dialogue, affecting how we see ourselves and others. For example, the positive behavior and qualities our parentsor early caretakers had helped us form a positive sense of self as well as many of our values. If we felt love, acceptance or compassion directed toward us, this nurtured our real self and the positive feelings we have about who we are in the world. However, the critical attitudes and negative experiences we withstood formed and fueled our anti-self. Early rejections and harmful ways of relating affect a child’s budding self-perception, not to mention their point of view toward other people and relationships in general. These impressions become the voices in our heads." - Lisa Firestone

When my inner critic says something mean or nasty, I ask myself, would I talk to my favourite friends that way? Would I speak critically, cruelly, judgementally, and with a lack of kindness and compassion? 

Imagine what a different place the world would be if we all treated each other AND OURSELVES like our favourite friends. 

Be kind, 

To yourself too

xo

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